I'm writing this post on November 9th, the day after the presidential election. The results of the election were not what I was expecting. At. All.
As I scrolled Facebook last night, watching the results come in, I noticed a lot of discussion about coping mechanisms for what was going on. Bags of dill pickle chips. Wine. Whiskey. Plans for champagne that materialized for some and didn't for others.
Eating and drinking our feelings.
Not everyone did this. I, myself, had such a psychosomatic response that I felt sick to my stomach and had a terrible headache. At a certain point I just went to bed to put myself out of my misery.
This morning, the sun rose again, as usual. I got up and got ready and got the kids ready and got them to school, as usual. But my emotions are, by far, not the usual.
I am definitely experiencing my fair share of negative emotion today, which is a normal and expected part of our human experience.
I am reminding myself that while I think something has gone gravely wrong with our country, nothing has gone wrong in the fact that I feel the way I do.
And I am choosing this negative emotion, as much as it doesn't feel like an option. Our thoughts create our feelings, which drive our actions, which determine our results in life. Not everyone in the world thinks the same about the election results as I do, which means my thinking is optional.
But because I like my reasons for my thoughts about the election results, I want to keep them, and that means experiencing the discomfort of these negative emotions.
It's so commonplace and accepted for us to want to do something to feel better rather than choosing a different thought that makes us feel better. I've seen lots of offers for various alcoholic beverages and comfort foods. Today I dressed myself in really soft, warm clothes. It felt like self care to envelope myself in comfort.
But when we truly understand that nothing can change our negative emotions permanently except choosing different thoughts, we know that eating and/or drinking doesn't really make anything better. The negative emotions are still there waiting for us.
I was sitting on my couch this morning, trying to make sense of my world that seems almost unrecognizable from what my world looked and felt like yesterday.
Then I glanced over to one of my side chairs. I saw the decorative pillow sitting on it. I read the message printed on it.
“GIVE THANKS”
It felt like the suggestion of a new thought. The universe offering me an alternative.
I began to think of all the things and people and experiences in my life that I'm grateful for. It was a really long list.
Thankfully, the results of this election don't change that list, at least not by much.
I may still have a heavy heart today, but the gift I'm offering myself is allowing myself to experience this negative emotion without drinking a pumpkin spice latte to try to drive it away and headspace to think about and feel gratitude for the multitude of things that are good and right and loving about this world we live in.
I'd like to offer you the gift of gratitude as well.
